Friday Five: Shaking It Up 

Sometimes I find our language modeling is getting stale. The first sign is usually that we begin noticing repetitive conversations and phrases. We aren’t branching out, and so Diva is not branching out. We might use the device a little less, and rely more on guesswork and gestures. Here are five things we do to help keep the routine from getting stale — and to keep expanding Diva’s language. 

  1. Add more words. And make them interesting ones! Add more basic core words, certainly, but also add fun words like delicious and aggravated and mime. Part of learning to talk is falling in love with the language. Give your child things that s/he can fall in love with. And if your system has no room for playful words, it might be time to explore new systems. 
  2. Add special interests. A lot of moms I know talk about how they add new TV characters when their child starts losing interest in their talker. This makes so much sense to me because our kids need to be able to talk about the things THEY love. If they can’t, they won’t use it. Add TV characters and train line stops and the titles to favorite songs. Give them a way to tell you about what they love. We just added the characters from Yo Gabba Gabba, and you can bet that was the first thing Diva wanted to talk about in the morning. 
  3. Double-check: are you ensuring access to the system all the time? Systems are so easy to get left behind. This is why we use a Gab & Go Harness. When we start seeing a drop in language use, we often find that we weren’t doing our best to re-attach her harness after a bath, or first thing in the morning. The talker HAS to be there to take advantage of opportunities as they arise. If your child cannot have constant access or easily initiate their full system, maybe consider teaching use of an “I have something to say!” wrist band (raise arm in air), Big Mack, or other way to provide a link between child and system. And make that always available. 
  4. Try a new activity. Be creative and try a new play activity that might spark ideas for words. New activities inspire us to try new words, but they also offer us a chance to let go of the “I know her like a mom does” thing. We make a lot of assumptions about what our kids think and feel. New activities force us to drop that and see what they actually SAY about this. And there are so many different things we can explore. In a FB community, a mom mentioned having her child direct her to make different things with Play-Doh. Dana wrote a blog about TV character puppets. We have used new music videos to spark conversation, since Diva is hugely into music. I think it’s really, really important for the activity to be chosen because it’s FUN, not because of its therapeutic value. FUN is what gets kids talking. 
  5. Create a new family ritual. Find a way to add a 2-3 minute family ritual to your day that relies on communication. Don’t make it hard or a burden. And don’t pick a time of day that’s already hectic. Morning rituals would be a disaster for us. Evenings work better. Dinner. Before bed. After bath. Rituals can be prayers, questions about days, telling stories, sharing a cuddle on the couch, working together on a puzzle . It’s what works for YOUR family and what causes you to model. One of our favorites is to have everyone share a highlight or funny part of their day at the beginning of dinner. It doesn’t happen every single night, but it happens often. We model things that we say, and then we give Diva her own turn. Seeing her participate on her own has been awesome. No more guessing or relying on teacher’s notes. She says herself – “markers markers markers” and “favorite show want get”. That’s worth all the time and effort in the world. 
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